21 二月


You get scared when you leave a white collar job that you’re gonna end up picking up trash.  Well, not to worryYou can’t get that job.  It’s a union gig.  A city gig你会害怕你会像Bukowski一样被困在一些精神崩溃的公务员队伍中But you can’t get a job at the post office.  They’re cutting back.  You have to know somebody.  You can’t get a job flipping burgers.  You’re overqualified (in my case, this is真正)You can’t do shit labor on a construction site.  Half of Mexico is up here trying to do that.

So what can you do.  You can get a job in a STEM field, they tell you.  If only you had gotten your degree in a STEM field, you would be in great demand.  Science, technology, engineering, mathematics.  A computer programmer, in other words.  Do you know how fucking hard that shit is?  I could barely pass my intro to C++ class, and I’m聪明.  Your ability to do that shit is purely genetic, and it’s the same gene that makes you smell like cheese and talk like that恋童癖者的RealDoll极度响亮和令人难以置信的关闭.  Hearing that little pussy talk makes me think we need more bullying in schools.  There is no talented computer programmer on the face of this earth who can buy a six pack at the liquor store and make small talk with the clerk normally.  There certainly isn’t one who can speak to a woman 

The oil boom.  That’s the place, they tell you.  One hundred thousand dollars per year to live in a dorm in North Dakota and sweep up steel shavings or some shit.  They need welders, they need engineers.  I am a massive pussy and clumsy as fuck; if I were anywhere near one of those giant grinding fire belching machines I would get sucked in and pureed on my first day.  I would make some smartass comment and an ex convict with a third grade education would beat me within an inch of my life.  I would go crazy from lack of pussy and torch the whole operation.  That shit is the fucking fires of hell, man.  Still, there are jobs out there.  Negative twenty degrees and the air is like sucking a diesel truck’s tailpipe, but it’s a living.

I hate immigrants now.  Because I think things would be so great without them– it could每小时8美元将山羊尸体扔进猫粮厂的巨型搅拌机They do the jobs nobody wants, people say.  Well of course that’s bullshit, but then, I go to their country and pay ten bucks to fuck their daughtersTurnabout很公平。

There’s nothing out there but then again I haven’t looked.  I’m waiting for my State of California jobs pamphlet to show up.  See what jobs the government thinks are appropriate for someone of my skill set.  Tossing goat carcasses in the blender most likely.  Fine.  Someone’s gotta do it.  But seriously, I kind of want to take a day job out of the State of California jobs  pamphlet just to see what fucking happens.  Who on Earth turns to the state of California to fulfill their staffing needs in this, the most management-friendly labor market in the history of the First World.  The country is a Home Depot parking lot and we’re all flannel-clad Mesoamericans with third grade educations and ringworm.  We are all clamoring to jump into some white man’s UHaul, possibly to be hunted for sport.  All we want is enough for  tall boy of Tecate and a bag of tortillas.  Maybe one of those weird foam cups with the colored salt on the rim.  And still, that’s too much of a dream.  Lawyers can’t get jobs.  Doctors have to see two hundred patients a day.  Porn stars can barely suck dick for money; they gotta do the hardcore paywall shit like have a窥器卡在他们的屁股There is only one way to make money and that is to inherit it, or push  it around for people who inherited it.  Eighty hours a week squinting at spreadsheets, looking for a way to make eight one hundredths of a cent every time  some prince’s firm in Dubai cuts back on a steel order from Poland.

I would propose some social change, but it would all boil down to: just give me some money.  Redistribution.  Just take money from rich people and give it to poor people. 他们对此有所说明他们告诉你:共产主义为什么不把你荒谬的世界GDP份额分给非洲的一些孩子.  I don’t know, but fuck them.  Let them eat hyenas.  I just want to get paid a living wage to jerk off and play Xbox.  I don’t see why that’s too much to ask.


  1. 博士错觉 2013年2月21日晚上9:09



  2. unscrupulousmen 2013年2月21日晚上9:36


  3. vsoze 2013年2月21日晚上9:37

    Tecate的Tallboy就在这里也好吧Playing video games? gimme a break, let your picking hand nails grow and dust off that classical guit-fiddle.

  4. 詹姆士 2013年2月22日上午1:01


    • 小姐小姐 2013年2月22日上午1:51


      • 詹姆士 2013年2月22日上午1:55


      • 小姐小姐 2013年2月22日凌晨1:56


      • 詹姆士 2013年2月22日凌晨2:02


      • 小姐小姐 2013年2月22日凌晨2:04

        Yes!! Start writing!

      • 匿名 2013年2月22日上午9:37


      • 匿名 2013年2月22日上午11:55

        我的意思是,如果你已经屈服于“潮人” - 那么一路走下去 - 成为一名艺术家。

  5. dressyarson 2013年2月22日上午1:48

    如果您认为Intro to C ++很难,那么您可能会感到迟钝你知道,也许如果你通知加利福尼亚州你在上课时遇到麻烦,你可以得到某种延迟福利检查。

    • 小姐小姐 2013年2月22日上午1:55

      实际上,这是一个想法EDD检查结束时的永久SSIStart racking up an history now of depression/anxiety (although that will be pricey without health insurance) and then a well-orchestrated suicide attempt (make sure someone’s on hand to “rush” you to the ER and have your stomach pumped) and maybe a nice 72 hour hold…best if you can get it extended though…and then apply for disability and Cha-Ching!!! (My friend took this route, for real though, and got SSI on the first try even though everyone kept telling her she’d be denied and have to appeal at least twice).

    • 听起来你个人对这篇文章有点了解你闻起来像奶酪吗?

    • 匿名 2014年4月8日晚上8:27

      不要觉得太糟糕,DTC ++是一种狗狗语言,可以教别人如何编程Most commercial software could be written with a working knowledge of control flow and basic data types, but you walk into a C++ class and it’s “explicitly instantiated template methods” this and “const-reference iterator to a pointer” that, “unresolved symbol in @#155533_fuckedup_mangled_name_@” this, “access violation at 0xFFFFFFFFF” that, “null-terminated byte array” this…you get the idea.



  6. 甘尼克斯 2013年2月22日上午7:51


  7. 匿名 2013年2月22日上午8:50

    对你来说最明显和最容易忽视的选择是F-ing研究生院你应该庆祝一个事实,你还没有得到一个 - 因此将完全启用实现一个这是一种方式,有时间从作为奴隶过渡到已出版的作者,这是有教养,访问,讲授他的实践说真的 - 你会被淹死在年轻的猫,期待整天阅读,批评,自我重要 - 并得到无限的关注和对你的工作的回应加州大学洛杉矶分校的写作非常棒想想吧。

    • 匿名 2013年2月22日上午8:51

      “得到一个” - 显然意味着“硕士学位”。

  8. 释放牛肉 2013年2月22日下午1:17

    吐息,TacosSmell that? Your solution is dripping off of this blog post山羊胴体窥器色情还没有人看到那个狗屎从Lowe's(墨西哥家庭仓库中的一些人)获取一些危地马拉人,其中一些上面提到的强硬色情女孩,揣测他们的小孔,并开始将山羊尸体扔进那些空洞的蛀洞打电话给Hasler,看看她对山羊胴体干跑的看法打开她,解决问题,改变世界。

  9. 高级测试版 2013年2月22日下午1:56

    嘿,Tucker Max确实写得好喝醉了So he was from a rich family and a lawyer? He hated work, just like you你的故事几乎和Roosh一样好他并没有做得太糟糕。

    • NIKOL 2013年2月22日下午6:37






      • 小姐小姐 2013年2月22日晚上9:17


  10. Clash1e 2013年2月22日晚上11:47



  11. 杰西卡小屋 2013年2月23日下午7:09




  12. I was doing a side job one time for this lady, she lived in Medford Lakes, NJ; this idyllic little town on the edge of the Pine Barrens在郊区和州际高速公路和商业航空公司之前的一天,它曾经是城市居民的避暑胜地。When you wanted to go on vacation you loaded all of your belongings in a steamer trunk, hand-cranked up the Model T, hoping it didn’t backfire and kick back breaking your wrist, just to travel twenty miles to a lake cabin in the woodsThis was considered an ideal honeymoon back then; virgin newleyweds in full length, one-piece bathing suits sitting lakeside sipping Pimm’s cup cocktails chilled with ice cubes harvested right from the lake, full of pond scum and icehouse sawdustNow it’s your typical upper-class historic town, with newly built Mcmansions filling out the space between the old log cabins, quaint colonial houses, antique shops, summer camps and family farms that make more money giving hayrides and letting people pick pumpkins in the fall than from selling any crops or livestock驾驶Subaru Foresters的人可以使用“拯救Pine Barrens”牌照和车顶架为他们的L.L豆类皮划艇与此同时,200英亩的Pinelands生态系统被夷为平地,为他们生活的饼干切割机开发铺平了道路。

    Anyway, her house was this big, ugly, 70s style postmodern honeycomb shaped thing, with huge floor-to-ceiling glass windows and floating staircases, tucked away down a long gravel driveway in the woods它看起来像“杰森斯”中的东西我认为原来的老板是一名建筑师,并亲自设计她正在增加一个室内游泳池,我和我的朋友不得不给游泳池设备上线游泳池的一侧将被一个巨大的“天然”岩壁完全包围,该岩壁贯穿整个房间,朝向中心突出,形成瀑布。

    这一群墨西哥石匠在我们在那里的那天出来建造它这些家伙都是艺术家,我的意思是他们看起来很迷人They had this big pile of fieldstone boulders, they would grab one and rotate it in their hands while they meticulously chipped it down with a rock hammer till it was a perfect fit in the intricate interlocking puzzlework of the wall他们这么快就完美地做到了他们锤击这些石头并将这些瀑布拼凑在一起的技巧和轻松的轻松使它看起来像是在研究一些本能的反应 - 古老的阿兹特克石工技术根深蒂固在他们的DNA中瓦砾石工,他们称之为蹲下小小的棕色人物,像口袋妖怪的人物或其他东西,以完美的节奏一起工作,用怪诞的Nahuatl-西班牙语舌头吐出阴险的声音异教徒亵渎神秘的爆发,几乎不为语言学家所知我不能肯定地说,但我怀疑他们是一些原始的野蛮邪教的一部分,在前哥伦比亚黑暗宗教中有根和仪式,

    午餐时间,当我从Wendy's带着我的美元菜单回来时bacon cheeseburgers, fries and frosty, the Mexicans were unpacking a cooler full of exotic culinary staples; spicy peasant foods that upset and offend the delicate sensibility of the pure American stomach他们征服了“蝾螈” - 一种煤油燃料的空间加热器,看起来有点像烟囱帽 - 准备一个名副其实的奇异玉米饼壳混合物的宴会One threw a tortilla shell on top of the rusty, red-hot heater, while another fished ingredients out of the cooler: fresh red chili peppers, guacomole, onions, sour cream, bell peppers, tomatoes, jalapeno peppers – and yet another began slicing and portioning the vegetables他们把工地变成了他妈的Chi-Chi。

    我弯下腰来诅咒他们,同时弯下我的手指,形成了“mano cornuta”,这是我祖母发誓的一种方法,它可以防止任何“malocchio”在他们的眼神中被“iattatore”甩在我的路上。

    After lunch, as they went back to work, I noticed there were inscriptions on the rocks, and as they built the wall a message formed, it said: “Sylviasarah es a chaparra y panzona piruja jajajaja” To this day I have no idea what that mysterious phrase means, and I’m not sure I want to know人类的大脑无法忍受其他一些其他的恐怖事件。

    • lolcopterpilot 2013年2月27日上午11:41


      • 谢谢哥们儿真实的故事,除了关于墙上铭文的部分我把它扔到这里与其中一个评论者操,但我想她没有读过它他们淘汰了所有这些墨西哥食物,并开始在这个生锈的屁股空间加热器上烹饪玉米饼不过看起来不错而且我不得不佩服他们的聪明才智以及他们仍然拥有文化的事实。

        我在写这篇名为“The Redror of Red Hook”的文章前几天读到了H.P Lovecraft的故事。充满了对当时涌入埃利斯岛的南欧人的所有这些表现出来的,非理性的仇外恐惧换句话说,我的曾祖父母这对我来说很有趣,所以我试着模仿一下。


        不要误会我的意思,我和下一个人一样讨厌墨西哥人,但不是因为任何愚蠢的种族主义原因我恨他们,因为他们破坏了我的同工和同胞的工资And in an economy with a %10 unemployment rate, or whatever it is, I think it’s crazy that we have millions of illegal immigrants doing all kinds of jobs that “Americans won’t do for themselves.” I heard John McCain pleading their case the other day, now that the Republican party all of the sudden supports themHe said something along the lines of, “these people mow raise our children, clean our houses, mow our lawns, pick our crops.” And I’m thinking, what fucking America does John McCain live in where everybody has nannies and housekeepers and landscapers这是我听过的最无意识的傲慢的演讲,并讲述了政治家之间的巨大脱节。

  13. lolcopterpilot 2013年3月1日上午10:51

    我得出类似的结论:移民对于每一代人来说似乎都是同一个故事,我们每个人都同意讨厌真正的“坏”移民,这意味着每个人都追随我们似乎移民改革基本上拧紧了劳动者阶层,同时给予精英们廉价的草坪护理/建筑/儿童保育/清洁/等我自己心情复杂I really can’t believe people who are already here, willingly and knowingly illegally, may soon be able to apply for green cards, while people who have followed the law are waiting decades just to get over here例如,我的表弟已经等了10多年才得到他的绿卡当他访问美国之前,人们告诉他只是逾期居留签证并申请庇护或他可能会收到的东西,但他遵守规则并离开10年如果他的母亲是美国公民,他的生活时间足以让USCIS接受他的申请,他将只会再次进入美国他的妈妈病了,可能活得那么久我堂兄是一名医生,在她去世前拼命想见他妈妈,也想在美国做药回到他身边。

    If you have ever visited a USCIS office you see that after you are naturalized, just as you are leaving the building, there is a table set up next to the door: “Register to vote here.” The Democrats and Republicans are basically fighting over a potential wave of 11million new voters没有长期计划,只是一个持续的运动。

    • 我不知道为什么我在早些时候感到遗憾的是,在我没有采取任何措施来保护我自己的文化时,这种文化的解体例如,我妈妈可以煮一千种不同的意大利菜,我甚至无法开始告诉你如何制作其中任何一种You grow up eating all of this stuff: stuffed artichokes and broccoli rabe and pasta e fagioli and big pots of Sunday gravy with sausage and meatballs and bracciole and struffoli: these little fried dough balls you make for Christmas, they’re covered in honey so you can shape them, my grandmother would shape them like a Christmas tree and cover them in green, red and white jimmies塔拉利斯(Tarallis)一直蘸着自酿葡萄酒但你认为这是理所当然的You think everybody eats like that until you go over one of your friend’s houses for dinner and it’s takes every ounce of your being to choke down the fucking hamburger Helper slop recipe their mother made, that she got right off the back of the box, while concealing your gags and dry-heaves like you’re on an episode of Fear Factor我发现大多数美国人都不会因为狗屎而做饭,这就是为什么他们吃得太多了或者他们煮出最卑鄙的狗屎:干涸的烤牛肉,煮熟的胡萝卜和豌豆,纸板土豆泥 - 他们就像生活在庄园里的一些他妈的中世纪农奴一样吃你不仅认为这是理所当然的,而且你会厌倦它如果我在生活中从未吃过另一盘意大利面,我就不会放弃好吧,除了意大利面和蛤蜊。

      其余部分,它已经如此淡化,与传统脱节,使得庆祝似乎毫无意义或者你怨恨它比如天主教会我从小信奉天主教不只是天主教徒,而是俗气的天主教徒像玛丽在前窗天主教的半壳雕像上祈祷圣安东尼当你失去了天主教徒固定美元钞票到马格达莱纳德帕齐天主教的雕像你的头脑里钻了很长时间你只是拒绝它这个天主教的品牌是如此老式和迷信,它在后现代资本主义社会中没有地位黑道家族在“The Ride”剧集中处理这个phenemenon做得很好说出你对“黑道家族”的看法,但它可能是唯一一部以细致入微的方式处理意大利美国经历的节目/电影之一这不仅仅是一个黑手党的故事。


      • lolcopterpilot 2013年5月6日上午7:34


        I had a similar experience to yours growing up, that’s why usually it was friends coming to eat at my house, and saying “this is the best chicken and rice I’ve ever had!” and me shrugging, nbd, I eat this every day食物是由爱你的人组成的食材制成的,“食物”是在不知名的地方包装的可食用脱水物质,并在商店购买。


        I’m beginning to think we’ve all forgotten the meaning of the word “discipline” and replaced it with misdirected “shame.” If only people would realize shame is a tool to increase the amount of love in the world by encouraging self-improvement through discipline虽然抱怨其他想象中的怪物,“特权”更容易。


  14. 匿名 2013年4月11日上午8:07

    #$ ThEw#ff13PATT rN0nspielbergsass

  15. 匿名 2013年4月11日上午8:08

    #$ ThEw ff13PATT3rN0nspielbergsass

  16. 爱你 2014年5月4日上午7:21

    天啊,我爱你的博客我一直在痴迷于人们如何不愿意承认他们已经没有他妈的工作了,关于STD的神话以及避孕套怎么都没有结束I’m 22 years old and I’m good looking我们应该谈谈。


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