Archive | March, 2012

旧闻:占据洛杉矶第2部分

31日 损伤

最初发布于10/16/11:

I went down to Occupy Wall Street yesterday.  Occupy LA, rather, in front of City Hall.  I wanted to see what it was about, what people were actually protesting, what they actually wanted.  Also, I figured there would be girls there.

互联网上的谈话似乎没那么好,人们对“现在的方式”感到生气是可以理解的,但是“运动”没有具体的目标,除了早期的挫折之外真正代表什么所以虽然它日益增长的,而它的传播在世界范围内,当警察在祖科蒂公园的头和Carbanieri货车着火在罗马,直到这个“运动”的屎在一起,实际上问的东西它都将是。

From what I saw at occupy LA this is entirely accurate.  First, I was a little disappointed that it is in fact a peaceful, organized protest.  There was a march right before I got there, which seems to have gone smoothly and in an orderly fashion.  There is a tent city around City Hall that is completely confined to the grass with fastidious volunteers appearing out of nowhere every five minutes to pick up cigarette butts.  Protestors happily stayed contained in the few streets that the city had conscientiously blocked off to keep shit from getting out of hand, and gathered around a stage and PA system that seems to have been set up with all the appropriate permits.  There was an adequate amount of Port-o-sans.  The few cops visible were the LAPD’s bike-bound squad of “courtesy officers,” or whateverthefuck they’re called.  They wear purple shirts that make them look like the world’s most militant kickball team.  They kept to themselves, returned eye contact and smiled when smiled at.  This is different, I gather, from New York, where the NYPD is crushing people’s femurs and throwing haymakers at nancy-boy college kids.  As is their wont.继续阅读

旧闻:占领洛杉矶

30. 损伤

最初发布10/15/11:

Thinking about going down to Occupy LA today.  Not that I give a shit或者更确切地说,我认为这是一个有意义的运动与任何具体的目标如果他们有明确的目标,他们是不可能实现的。

并不是说我反对them either—while the “I am the 99 per cent” people complaining about student loans seem dopey to me, far worse is this “I am the 53 per cent (of legitimate income tax payers)” canard; the people holding up signs that说我引导底部参加公立学校,每周工作30个小时最低工资工作,没有即时的自由,现在我将买一个垃圾在凤凰城的房子,生孩子还必须每周工作30个小时被一些未受良好教育的吼jerkoff因为他们没有充分用拖把拖小通道之间的牛肉和鸡肉在麦当劳,烤架祝贺你,你是一个该死的傻瓜。我浪费了我的青春磨到骨头最贬低方式现在我坚持数十亿美元的人能够贡献什么你在说什么。

继续阅读

OKCupid的女性:

29日 损伤

你为什么都这么该死他妈的无聊?

There are about 3 profiles of single women in the greater Los Angeles area that reveal ANYTHING about the person whatsoever.  The rest, you are browsing this shit and you feel like God only made 5 people.

There’s the I was born in Wisconsin, went to school in Pennsylvania, came out to LA three years ago and haven’t looked back! The geography person谁他妈的——我们都生活在美国,我们都看同样的电视节目,为什么他妈的你认为它重要丝毫你来自哪个州除非是一些奇怪的狗屎像阿拉斯加或怀俄明,这是真正的世界上最没有意义的信息Even if you came from one of those places.  I’m not looking to get a状态drunk and rawdog them; I want to do that to a的人。

There’s the “contradiction” person.  This might be the blandest one of all.  I initially appear really shy and introverted, but once you get to know me I’m the life of the party! (This one often enjoys exclamation points).  I’m a traditional girl at heart, but I think outside the box! I’m a girly girl, but I love sports! I can be really nice and really mean!  I love reading books but I also enjoy trashy reality TV– shhh, don’t tell anyone!  Jesus– these fake examples I’m coming up with are actually more illuminating than the real thing.  This one is a deliberate construct that is设计什么都不告诉你继续阅读

OKCupid:嘿Fuckstick,你让我开怀大笑

29日 损伤

Because we all know you like to be made to laugh; you’ve told us, over and over and over again.  Collectively you have said “live laugh love” or “make me laugh” a thousand million billion times.  Or you’ve put up the whorish-sounding “make me laugh and you can make me do任何事情。”Make me laugh and you can sneak it in my ass, is that what this means?  Make me laugh and you can jerk off in my mouth while watching porn?  Make me laugh and I will fuck guys off craigslist and bring you back the money?  I mean, I shouldn’t complain about this– I am not a professional comedian, but I consider myself funny.  And girls do in fact “do anything,” although the “anything” that I’m asking for is just to fuck me in the most vanilla manner imaginable.  I don’t require that they cook me a meal or take me on a date or engage me intellectually or anything, and they certainly haven’t offered. 让我开怀大笑,你可以让我做任何事。这几乎意味着出来——你把个性,我会把猫咪。

继续阅读

作为一个悲惨的人,

28 损伤

the concept of “hope” is still possible, but it’s hope in the negative希望有所作为发生,比如买一辆汽车事故或疾病或你爱的人有一个汽车事故或疾病Hope that the toilet doesn’t break.  Hope that you don’t lose your job, even though you hate it.  Hope that that thing on your dick doesn’t turn out to be what you fear it might be.  Or if you’re a chick, hope that the guy you slept with after six glasses of inexpensive pinot noir didn’t fire that first drop inside you and that instead the reason your period is four days late because of some vitamin deficiency.  Like, it would have happened on time if you had eaten more spinach or chicken is what it is, not that you are now carrying the seed of a guy with visible pores in his nose and why does he keep such long stubble even though his beard is grossly sparse and patchy, and his hideous long nipple hairs… Hope that you didn’t leave the stove on, as you suddenly and vividly suspect you might have at 9:15AM in the office and you are going to be at work until 7 and that greasy pot holder was laying close enough to the burner you boil your coffee on that the air will be so hot that the potholder will certainly catch flame; you picture your cat trapped screaming in the smoking house roasting alive and the upstairs neighbors horribly disfigured, skin grafts from their thighs giving their faces that weird newtlike appearance for the rest of their lives because you left the fucking stove on… hope that that doesn’t happen.  That’s what hope is.

继续阅读

我不想要

27 损伤

to go out with you.  I want to just fuck you.  But I don’t want to fuck the kind of girl who just fucks you.  And I don’t want to go out with the kind of girl who just goes out with you.  I want to fuck the kind of girl who goes out with you, and go out with the kind of girl who just fucks you.

丙型肝炎

26 损伤

一旦你得到不敏感常数性病歇斯底里, there’s a new one.  This time a girl wouldn’t fuck me because she was scared of Hepatitis C.    Another silent killer that you don’t know you have, except史蒂芬·泰勒看看他现在的样子帕米拉·安德森,现在看她。狗屎我不想看起来像史蒂芬·泰勒,但是如果我花了二十年吸烟freebase篮球大小的岩石,我的迪克没有花了十多分钟以外的一些MTV看渣自70年代,我会数数自己幸运像史蒂文•泰勒ambulatory and breathing.  But this Hep C is the new one; the new silent killerCan’t scare ’em with AIDS anymore so we better tell the kids they’ll look like Steven Tyler.  Or worse, they’ll write songs like Steven Tyler.

Or they trot out syphilis, like it’s 1532 and we’ve been fucking cave bears.  Or they point out that Chlamydia sneaks up on you and goes untreated and ravages your ovaries and you’ll die alone a childless spinster.  These things have been around, you know—these are things that a 1942 sailor would laugh off after a quick shot of penicillin.  These are things they made funny posters about in World War 2—she may LOOK clean, private, but Rosie’s got a surprise.  And dudes fucked Rosie anyway and then their dick hurt and they got a shot and it was over.  And they laughed about it.  Which is what you SHOULD do about STD’s.继续阅读